Paycheck: Part 1
Buffy walked into the Magic Box. When she got to the counter she saw a gift-wrapped present, a card and a legal sized business envelope sitting in a pile. Frowning she looked up at Anya. "What's this stuff?"
"It's Giles' birthday in a few days. I'm sending him a present and a card."
"It's his birthday? When is it his birthday?" Buffy didn't think she'd ever given Giles' birthday a thought in all the years she'd known him.
"Day after tomorrow."
"Huh. That's gonna get there late, isn't it?" Without waiting for an answer Buffy picked up the envelope. "So what's this?"
"His paycheck."
Buffy's brow furrowed. "You send him a paycheck?"
Anya shook her head. "No, that's from the Watcher's Council. He keeps telling them he's moved but they keep sending his mail here."
Buffy's jaw dropped. "He's still getting paid as a Watcher? When I'm the one here alone doing the Slaying?"
Anya shrugged. "He's still a Watcher. Most Watchers have never even met a Slayer."
Buffy's eyes grew dark. "I don't care. I'm working a minimum wage job that I hate, watching my bills mount up and he's in England doing squat, and he's the one getting paid?"
Anya shrugged again. Buffy put her purse on the counter and pulled out her checkbook. She held her checkbook, looking at the figures while angrily tapping the edge of the paycheck envelope on the counter. The bell rang on the front door and Willow walked in. "Hey Buffy, Anya."
"Willow, how much does it cost to fly to England?"
Willow made a puzzled face. "I don't know. Was I supposed to know this?"
"Could you find out for me?"
"Sure, why?"
Buffy wanted to wait to see how much it cost before she said anything. "Could you just look it up?"
Willow set up her laptop and began hitting keys. "When do you want to go?"
"Tomorrow."
Willow's eyebrows rose. "That's gonna make it more expensive." She entered that information in. "When do you want to come back?"
Buffy whined. "God, do you have to know all this stuff?"
Willow nodded. "I can't price it without it."
"Fine, make it a week later. I can change it if I have to, can't I?"
"Yeah, it may cost you some money."
Buffy rolled her eyes. "Is there anything that doesn't cost me some money?"
Willow let out a sigh and let that one go. "Do you have a passport?"
Buffy let out another whine. "Oh God. How fast can I get one?"
Anya chimed in. "Six weeks."
Buffy shook her head. "Wrong answer."
Willow came up with additional information. "You can go to LA and get one right away." She looked at her watch. "If you hurry."
Buffy gestured at Willow to hurry with the price. "So how much is it gonna cost me?"
Willow threw out a price and Buffy's jaw dropped. "How much?"
Willow told her again. "It's because you're leaving so soon."
Anya looked up from her paperwork. "Aren't there last minute fares you can get with some airline companies?"
Willow's eyes lit up. "Yeah. Let me check those sites." Willow's fingers flew across the keyboard and then she smiled. "Okay, still not cheap but it's about half the cost of the other one."
Buffy looked at her checkbook again and chewed the inside of her cheek as she considered her options. "Okay, book it. I'll use the last of Giles' money. Seeing as I plan to get more from him, a whole lot more, I guess that's all right." She held up the paycheck. "I can't believe he's still being paid. There is no justice in the world." She turned back to Willow. "Oh, can you find out where I need to go to get my passport? Then I guess I better bolt."
Willow supplied her with the information and told her what she'd need to take with her for identification. Then, having procured Buffy's credit card, she started ordering the ticket. Buffy went to the counter and scooped up Anya's present and card. "I'm glad I saw this. It's time I sent Giles a birthday present. Me. And my bills. I'll give him a birthday he won't forget." She glared at his paycheck. "I risk my neck, he abandons me, and he gets the money." Rolling her eyes at the injustice of it all she swept out of the store. Before she left she turned back to Willow. "Watch Dawn for me, will you? I'll be back later tonight." Willow nodded and kept working on the ticket.
***
Passport tucked in her pocket Buffy swept into Spike's crypt. He grinned when he saw her. "Just can't stay away, can you?"
"I just came by to say good bye. I'm going to England to yell at Giles."
Spike's eyebrows rose and he took a last drag on his cigarette. "What's he done to annoy you all the way across the big pond?"
She whipped out his paycheck. "He gets paid. He gets paid to have a normal life, while I get paid nothing to be the Slayer and raise Dawn."
"How much does he get paid?"
Buffy looked at the envelope and debated with her conscience. Her anger won and she ripped it open. Buffy's jaw dropped for the second time that evening as she converted the amount into an approximate yearly salary. "I don't believe it." She looked up at Spike. "You know that money he gave me?" Spike nodded. "Well, suddenly it's looking like petty cash." She started to pace. "He is so going to pay through the nose. Who does he think he is, leaving me like this and going off to gallivant around the world?"
Spike lit another cigarette. "Does he know you're going over there to rob him blind?"
"Of course not. I don't want to give him the opportunity to run off to Monte Carlo."
Spike watched her. "Planning on shagging him while you're there?"
Buffy stared at him. "What is it with you and shagging, and especially with me and Giles shagging? God." She started pacing again.
"Are you going to try and get him to come home with you?"
Buffy stopped and thought, her face growing more determined. "Yes, dammit, I am. I'll get him and his money." She nodded her head. "I'll make him come home with me. Thanks, Spike. Good idea."
Spike rolled his eyes and shook his head, disgusted that he'd even opened his mouth. "What makes you think this little plan of yours will work?"
"It better. I had to quit my job to go. I had a moment of sheer joy taking off that uniform, knowing I would never put it on again. God, I hated that job." She jabbed herself in the chest with her thumb. "I'm never working again. I'm going to be a kept woman." She grimaced. "Without the kept part, or with the kept part but without the free sex part, well, not that I plan to charge money, but…" She waved her hand in the air. "Never mind." She hesitated. "Will you keep an eye on Dawn? She wanted to go but I can barely afford my ticket as it is."
Spike cocked his head at her. "Yeah, I'll watch her. Fancy a quick shag before you leave?"
She shook her head. "That's over, Spike." She waved the paycheck in the air. "You're looking at a free woman, no more chains, and that includes you."
Spike looked hurt. "Well, then get the hell out of here, and don't bother coming back."
Buffy took in his look. "Spike. I'm sorry. You kind of got caught in my hurricane of pain. But I can't do it anymore. It's time I started making my life what I want it to be. And right now, that means no men, human or otherwise."
"Except your Watcher?"
"Well, yeah. But that's different. I'm not involved with him." Having nothing further to say Buffy smiled uncertainly at Spike and left his crypt.
Spike ground out his cigarette. "Yeah, right." He hopped back up on the stone coffin and lay down, staring at the ceiling.
***
Giles stepped outside of his flat. It had become a routine after waking, to go next door to the small café for some tea and a pastry of sorts. Giles found it soothing to start the day off at a gentle pace, even though it inevitably deteriorated due to his general state of unhappiness.
Picking his usual table he caught the waitress' eye. She brought him his tea and a selection of bakery goods. Choosing one he smiled at her and sat back, the book on the table unopened for the time being. Giles let out a sigh as he found himself already having to push aside unbidden thoughts of Buffy. Suddenly he heard a squeal. "Oh, my God, aren't you Mr. Giles?"
Giles looked up in some alarm to find two young women looking at him excitedly. He answered cautiously. "Yes, I am Rupert Giles."
One of the girls jabbed the other. "I told you it was him." They both sat down at his table, much to his dismay. One of the girls pointed to herself. "I'm Rhonda, this is Michelle. We went to Sunnydale High. You were the librarian there."
"Oh, right, of course." He stared at them both, at a loss. Finally he thought of something to say. "I'm afraid that I didn't recognize you at first, I wasn't expecting to see anyone I know from California here."
"I know, isn't it fun, though? I forgot you were English. I mean we knew you had that great accent and everything but we never figured you'd come back here, I mean, with Buffy and all." She frowned. "Or maybe you're just on vacation. Are you on vacation? We are." She looked at Michelle as if to confirm the fact that they were indeed on vacation.
Michelle nodded firmly. "Totally on vacation. Is Buffy here?"
Giles looked confused. "I live here now, and no, Buffy isn't here. You remember Buffy?"
"Well, like, yeah. Class protector. And all those weird rumors about her dying and then her not being dead. She was always kind of an odd duck." She bit her lip. "So you two have a falling out, or something?"
"Or something." He fondled his book, hoping they'd take the hint and leave.
"Bummer. You two always seemed so, you know, foreverish. I mean it was kind of creepy her being so young and you being so old, but hey, whatever."
"I beg your pardon?"
"You know, you and Buffy."
Michelle slapped Rhonda on the arm. "Well, if these guys broke up that explains why she was with that guy."
Rhonda opened her mouth. "God, you're right." She grimaced and looked at Giles. "I'd swear she was doing it with someone, at the Bronze."
Giles shook his head. "Doing it?"
"You know, having sex. Right there, in front of everyone."
"He was sort of cute."
"I know, but I can't believe she did it right out in the open. I mean, anyone could have seen."
"Yeah, like us."
"Right. Exactly." She frowned. "And that blonde hair of his is so out of a bottle."
"I did like his leather jacket. That was cool. Although, what's with her new haircut? She so needs to see my hairdresser." Rhonda and Michelle nodded at each other.
"Buffy's having…" Giles' face blanched at the thought of Buffy having sex, never a comfortable thought process for him at best. Then his face grew more pale at the thought of her having sex in public, not to mention that it sounded as if she had been with Spike.
Michelle made a small moue with her lips. "Oops, are you still in love with her?" She looked at Rhonda. "Maybe we shouldn't have mentioned Buffy and, you know, having sex."
Rhonda nodded and looked at Giles, snapping her gum. "Forget we said that." With that accomplished she leaned in towards Giles, as if to share the deepest of secrets. "So, come on, tell us, what did you have on Snyder?"
"What?" This conversation was rapidly spiraling out of control in so many truly alarming ways.
"Snyder. I mean everyone knew you were messing around with Buffy, but he never fired you. What was with that? What juicy skeleton did you have on him? You can tell us now, cuz, you know, he's dead and you and Buffy aren't together anymore."
"Buffy and I…" Giles couldn't seem to get out a sentence of more than three words.
"Yeah. Although the thing with Miss Calendar kinda threw us. Because I thought you were already with Buffy then. But all of sudden you were kissing Miss Calendar every time I turned around." Her eyes lit in excitement. "Unless Miss Calendar liked Buffy too." Rhonda looked at Michelle, thrilled beyond belief at the juicy gossip potentially to be revealed right before their very eyes.
Michelle gasped. "The three of you? Wow."
Giles had finally had enough. "Stop it, stop it right now. I have no idea where you are getting these ideas, but Buffy and I were never involved that way."
Rhonda rolled her eyes. "Oh please. You hardly need to lie to us now. We're all adults here and Buffy's a kazillion miles away. She'll never even know we saw you, we never see her."
Michelle had to differ. "Well, that's not quite true, we see her all the time at that fast food place."
"Oh, yeah. Well, we don't have to tell her."
"What would be the fun of that?"
"True." She looked back at Giles. "Okay, forget about that too. Now give us all the nasty details."
Giles looked at his watch and stood. "Look at the time. I have to go."
Rhonda pouted. "Damn, just when it was getting good, too." She shrugged. "Oh well." She looked at Giles' uneaten pastry. "You gonna eat that?"
Giles looked wildly at the plate. "No, please, help yourself." He went inside and handed the waitress sufficient money for the meal and for the tip. Then without another word he hurried away, moving right past his apartment, horrified at the thought of these two knocking on his door to harangue him for more details.
Rhonda split the pastry in half. "Man, he sure can keep a secret."
"I think he was a little wigged with that gossip about Buffy having sex in public."
"I know. Probably shouldn't have let that one slip until we got him to tell us about Snyder. We sort of lost our bargaining power."
Michelle nodded at Rhonda's wisdom and nibbled on her half of the pastry.
End Part 1
Paycheck: Part 2
Giles walked for a long time and by the time he found himself back in his neighborhood he was considerably calmer. They'd misinterpreted what they'd seen, that was the only explanation. After all they'd clearly drawn as wrong a conclusion as possible about he and Buffy, and about Jenny, so how could they possibly be considered reliable informants. It had to be a misunderstanding. Buffy would never have sex with Spike, and she'd certainly never have sex with him in public.
Thus reassured he finally made his way back to his flat. Looking cautiously to make sure the two girls were nowhere to be found he quickly put his key in his door and slipped inside.
***
Giles had erotic dreams about Buffy that night. The two of them were having sex everywhere, in the Bronze, in the old library, in the Magic Box, at a cricket match, at the park down the street. Giles woke up, disoriented. He'd never had dreams like that about Buffy. He'd had the occasional waking fantasy of her but never endless sex all night long in one public venue after another. Giles hadn't had sex in public in a very long time and even though it had all been a dream, somehow he felt as if he'd been caught.
After taking a shower he decided to risk the café again. First he looked out his window to make sure the girls weren't there, although the likelihood of actually running into them again was low. Seeing that the coast was clear he headed over and took his usual table. Grabbing a free newspaper he began to peruse the front page, sipping his tea, his scones sitting to the side.
An actual shiver ran down his spine when he heard the squeal. "Oh my God, he's back."
"We are so lucky." Before he could protest, Michelle and Rhonda sat down again at his table. Rhonda continued. "We never thought we'd run into you again. It was such a drag that you had to leave yesterday before we got to finish gossiping. So…?" She looked at Giles expectedly.
Giles blew out a breath. "I thought I made myself clear, Buffy and I were simply friends…"
Michelle looked up. "Oh, look, there's Buffy now."
***
Buffy had been wandering down the street, holding the piece of paper with Giles' address on it. Finally she was standing in front of his home; she confirmed it one more time. As she was about to climb the steps to ring the bell she heard a voice. "Buffy, yoo hoo, Buffy."
***
Giles rolled his eyes. Would these girls never stop? Rhonda grinned at him. "You devil you. You said she wasn't here. Friends…right." She blew a raspberry at him.
Giles turned his head and his jaw dropped. "Good Lord, Buffy."
Buffy had started towards the cafe when she'd heard her name being called. When she heard Giles' voice she stopped and zeroed in on him, and his two female companions. Her eyes grew flinty as she stormed over to him. "This is what you're doing? Hanging around with floozies?"
Rhonda and Michelle giggled, awestruck at their luck.
Giles sputtered. "Buffy…what…how…?" He looked at his watch as if it might have an answer for him.
Buffy was on a roll. "How dare you? How dare you abandon me like that? Did you just think you could write me that one check and that would make it all right? How am I supposed to make it with an extra mouth to feed? Don't you feel any responsibility to us at all?"
Michelle and Rhonda's mouths opened wide and both of them dropped their eyes to Buffy's stomach.
Giles took his glasses off and ran his hand over his face. "Buffy…"
"No, I mean it Giles. I thought you loved me. I thought you cared about me. And here you are, with two women. You've probably been sleeping around ever since you got back. You probably haven't even thought about me once."
Giles put his glasses back on. "Buffy, stop." He glanced at Michelle and Rhonda and rolled his eyes at their rapt attention. He was sure they had never listened to a single teacher with even a fraction of this devotion.
Buffy had no intention of stopping. "I came all the way here to get you back. But you know what? Maybe I don't want you back. You and your women and your…" She waved her hand at his table, "…your scones."
Giles became annoyed. "Whether I come back or not is hardly something that you will be deciding for me. And as long as we're flinging accusations, what about you and Spike?"
Buffy's eyes widened and she winced. "How did you find out about that?"
Giles' eyebrows almost rose off his head. "You mean it's true?" He stood and glared at her. "Did you have …" Giles swallowed and tried again. "Did you have sex with him at the Bronze?" Buffy winced again. Giles took off his glasses again, whipping out a handkerchief to clean them furiously. "And you have the audacity to stand there and accuse me of inappropriate behavior?" His movements still angry, he put his glasses back on.
Buffy stood for a moment, guilt racing across her face, searching for a response. She found it and spit it out, victorious. "Hey, you left me, remember?" Then she looked at Michelle and Rhonda and got a puzzled expression on her face. "Don't I know you?"
Rhonda nodded. "Yeah, we went to Sunnydale High with you. Same class." She pointed to Giles. "We've been keeping Mr. Giles company while he waited for you." She leaned towards Buffy. "Sorry, we kind of let the Bronze thing slip, we thought you guys had broken up." She checked out Buffy. "You look really good. I didn't even know you were pregnant."
Buffy stared at her. "What? I'm not…" She shook her head and tried again with something that felt more easily tackled. "You thought who had broken up?"
Giles interrupted. "Don't ask. It's too ridiculous for words."
"No, I want to know." She turned to Rhonda. "Tell me."
Rhonda obliged. "You and Mr. Giles. We knew you guys were doing it all through high school and then I'd see you hanging around at his store so we figured you were still together. But then we saw him here and he said that you guys had broken up."
Giles protested. "I did not say we'd broken up."
Buffy needed some clarification. "When you say doing it, you mean…"
Giles rolled his eyes. "Really, you don't want to know."
Rhonda insisted on being helpful. "You know, having sex. Everyone at school knew it." She looked at Michelle, her eyes wide. "Maybe it was Buffy who had something on Snyder."
Michelle snapped her fingers. "Good point." She looked at Buffy. "Did you have the goods on Snyder? We never could figure out why Mr. Giles didn't get fired or you get kicked out of school."
Buffy smiled wryly. "I did get kicked out."
Rhonda nodded. "Yeah, but it wasn't for screwing, was it? Plus you got back in. How did you get back in?"
"My mom kept talking to people." Giles was shaking his head. Buffy noticed it and she glared at him. "Then how did I get back in?"
Giles suddenly realized he was shaking his head. He nodded it instead. "Yes, that's quite right. It was your mum."
Buffy's eyes narrowed. "Giles. How did I get back into school?"
Giles shook his head again. "It's not important. The important thing is that you got back in and graduated."
Michelle chimed in. "And got out alive."
Rhonda nodded. "Yeah, that was a really weird day."
"Totally."
Buffy wasn't ready to let it go. "Will you for once be honest with me?"
Giles' jaw dropped. "Me, be honest with you? When all you've done since I've known you is prevaricate and misdirect?"
She snapped at him. "Just tell me. How did I get back in school?"
He snapped back. "I threatened Snyder. There. Are you satisfied?" Giles' eyebrows rose as he realized what he'd just blurted out.
Rhonda let out a squeal. "See, I knew there was something." She looked at Michelle. "He threatened him."
"Well, he is a lot bigger than Snyder."
"Way bigger."
Buffy was feeling sort of glowy, like in the watching Giles skewer the Mayor on her behalf kind of way. "You threatened him? For me?"
Giles took his glasses off again. "It wasn't right. He was being unreasonably vindictive."
Buffy grinned at him, and then she grinned at Michelle and Rhonda. Then she frowned at them. "What exactly did you mean when you said you were keeping Giles company?"
Rhonda's eyes opened wide. She'd seen Buffy throwing punches. "Nothing." She gestured at the table. "Just gossiping, I swear." She sent Giles a chiding look. "But, you know, Mr. Giles, Buffy has a point. You were sort of lying to us, too. Telling us that there was nothing between the two of you." She shook her head sadly as if deeply disappointed by his behavior. "I mean this is so lover's tiff stuff." She looked at Michelle. "Don't you think?"
Michelle nodded her head. "Oh, yeah, totally lover's tiff stuff."
"And leaving her with a baby." Rhonda shook her head again and made little tsk tsk noises at him.
Giles had had enough again. He was appalled that he'd allowed any of this argument to air in public, not to mention in front of these two. They were clearly two of the biggest gossips in Sunnydale, with little care as to whether they were spewing the truth or not. He threw some money down on the table and started to make his escape.
Buffy was still on the argument and she glared at him. "You told them there was nothing between us? Nothing?" Her voice rose to quite a high volume.
Giles hissed at Buffy. "Buffy, can we continue this in private?"
Rhonda touched his arm. "Don't mind us."
Giles closed his eyes and counted to ten. "Ladies, it was lovely running into you. Enjoy the rest of your vacation." He turned to Buffy. "Buffy, let's go." He picked up Buffy's suitcase and left without another look at anyone. Realizing that he was unavoidably letting Michelle and Rhonda know where he lived, he opened his door and threw the suitcase inside. He called to Buffy again. "Buffy."
Buffy gritted her teeth and followed him in.
Michelle and Rhonda grinned at each other, squealing. Rhonda spoke first. "They are so in love with each other."
"Totally in love."
They sat down at the table and began eating Giles' scones.
End Part 2